Yesterday's child

Like scar tissue, the past strangles and constricts
You cannot move and you cannot breathe
Judgement passed merely on your actions
No recourse, no forgiveness, no salvation

It is the same in the courts of men
Where age old questions of love and war were tried
Then why should matters of the heart be spared
Mercy is but a preacher's living fare

The guttural scream of change reverberates in you
But there is no sound, gagged by deeds
A lamp tries to shine away the darkness of yesterday
But they will put it out, to die as you were born

A friend of mine once told me about the muslim belief that every person has a log in heaven where his good deeds and bad deeds are recorded. It could be imagined to be like an accountants book with a side for credit and debit. When you die, you will be judged by the things in that book. Far for me to assume knowledge of afterlife, I am a heathen anyway. But it has been a painful discovery for me that such a book is kept in our time as well, in the minds of people. And its true even for people you are closest with. You will be judged everyday on the credits and debits that you make. You may think that you are doing something you enjoy with no conditions or expectations, but you are wrong. Everything is measured. Even seemingly irrelevant actions. These small debits add up to increase the red side of the book that will be used to judge you when the time comes. When you debit too much, ill will comes in which is hard to wipe out no matter how big a credit or sacrifice you are willing to make.

So people, don't fall into the folly of being complacent. Always try to live your life knowing that you have to make as much credits as you are making debits. To give as much as you get, if not more. To love as much as you want to be loved.

And if you do fall into the red like me, try to redeem yourself. Even though it is hard and seems impossible. Even if you are likely to fail, at least you would have passionately fought for what you believed in.